Revealing all

Are there any other issues that bother you about nudism / naturism not covered above? How can it be Christian? Other? Any question is acceptable, just keep the conversation courteous and respectful.<P>Only Residents and higher may post here.

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Revealing all

Postby nature » Thu Nov 19, 2015 6:22 am

I've have not posted in a while, all is going well with me and the family. I am practically clothes free every minute that I am home. From time to time my kids will also shed their clothing. My wife has now has slowly started to sleep in the nude most nights, but still does not like being clothes free in general and at this stage there is still no hope of going to a clothing optional beach/resort/or a get together.

But lately what's been bothering me the most is I'm living a double life. I have created a separate Facebook profile and hide behind false identities online. I feel that this is not a healthy/wise situation to be in and I feel that I need to be true to whom I am. But at the same time I am fearful to do it.

I feel that my first step would be to discuss this with my Pastor as we have walked a long road together (almost 20 years). He has assisted me with dealing through some tough issues in my life as a result of my sexual abuse as a kid. So the real issue is to I become open and honest and reveal all or do I continue living what I feel is a double life?

Any advice/suggestions is most welcome.
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Re: Revealing all

Postby Petros » Thu Nov 19, 2015 9:44 am

Much depends on the nature of the double [multiple?] life. Some of us by nature manifest ourselves differently in different contexts [I expect everyone does to some degree, but with my kind the differences are greater] and some are regular actors, playing sometimes very different characters. At one point I was I think three Facebook presences, one enabling more private exchanges with Number 1 Son.

While this is for some nature, it is undeniable that the tendency to multiply increases with stress. I cannot deal with my colleagues - so I become Sean D'Eau, poet and painter in addition to petros the linguist. The analysis of the phenomenon I have done up for family and close friends, some of whom have exhibited similar behaviors, suggests that being Sean unbeknownst to old friends to whom I introduce "myself" gives me a feeling of being in control - stealth power - not available in "real" life.

So much depends:
What is your stress level?
How many roles?
How different are you?
What does Sean do that your basic self would never do?
Can your basic self approve what Sean does?

Without knowng details, I imagine you need to find more practical paths out of stress. Change of life, spiritual work, and so on - you might locate a good homeopath.

As for revealing Sean and all to family and friends - would doing so help keep you singleminded? Would it potentially cause problems in your relationships? Analyze and pray before acting.
The truth, the stark naked truth, the truth without so much as a loincloth on, should surely be the investigator's sole aim - Basil Chamberlain
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Re: Revealing all

Postby JimShedd112 » Thu Nov 19, 2015 10:24 am

Welcome back. I decided long ago NOT to live a double life and use my real name even on-line, along with posting my full nude photos, though no new ones for a long time, mostly because I'm not really adept at re-sizing them to fit. But, I wanted people to know who I really am. There is one site (Nudist Clubhouse)where I've not been unable to change my username without deleting my account and starting over. Thetre I just use my name to identify myself when "signing" my posts.

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Re: Revealing all

Postby jochanaan » Thu Nov 19, 2015 1:32 pm

Hello again. Just as there is no "one size fits all" skin, there is no "one size fits all" plan for conducting our lives in regards to this "new" understanding and practice that we have embraced. For example, as I became more active on Facebook, I made a deliberate choice not to create a separate profile for "nudist me," but to be honest about who I was online. If anyone wants to block me, they have that option. The same with Google+ and Twitter. Yet I have made no serious attempt to "come out" to my extended family or my church families. I figure that the information is out there if anyone wants to ask, use or flame me. :)

This has, so far, worked for me. It may not for anyone else. And that's okay. 8)
You can live your life in fear--or you can live your life.
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Re: Revealing all

Postby natman » Thu Nov 19, 2015 1:37 pm

If you and your pastor have a long history together, there should be little concern about approaching him about discussions about simple, practical nudity and God's intention about the nude human body.

Unfortunately, many pastors have not really given it much thought nor studied what the Bible does and particularly does NOT say about the nude human body. They tend to get they opinions from the culture at large.

You may want to approach your pastor/friend from a third-person perspective by saying that you know "someone" who said they were both Christian and "naturist/nudist". Ask him if he has ever heard of such a thing and what the Bible says about it. Ask him what you should say to this "person" on the subject. Then listen to what he has to say. Don't argue one way or the other.

'Hope this helps.

As to maintaining dual accounts, until you are comfortable with presenting the truth and doing so will not have negative repercussions for others in your family, as long as your alternate accounts present yourself as you really are (no alter-egos, one saying nudity is good and the other saying nudity is bad etc.), then I would recommend continuing as you are.
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Re: Revealing all

Postby Petros » Thu Nov 19, 2015 2:13 pm

"(no alter-egos, one saying nudity is good and the other saying nudity is bad etc.)"

Right. For all my persona modulation over the years, all of them are Reader's Digest versions of ME - no aliens.

To thine own self be true.

The truth, nothing but truth, none of us can promise the WHOLE truth.
The truth, the stark naked truth, the truth without so much as a loincloth on, should surely be the investigator's sole aim - Basil Chamberlain
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Re: Revealing all

Postby JimShedd112 » Thu Nov 19, 2015 3:11 pm

Natman, while not untrue your counsel to refer to "someone I know" when initiating discussion with the pastor is intentionally deceptive, is it not?

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Re: Revealing all

Postby nature » Thu Nov 19, 2015 4:13 pm

I don't have a ultra ego and I am not planning to run a campaign in my local community to legalize open nudity or anything that drastic. It's just that I feel that I'm not being true to myself as I'm hiding the fact that I enjoy a clothes free lifestyle.

In a certain sense this feeling reminds me of a period in my life where I hid the fact that I could not stop watching porn. Since I've been free of porn I have vowed that I would not hide things again. And here I am again hiding my clothes free existence.

Maybe I'm overthinking things, maybe I've just got to much baggage . . I'm not sure but I do know I want to be open and honest.

natman I would not discuss it with my Pastor in a 3rd person format. If and when I do talk to him I will make it clear that it is me seeking answers.
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Re: Revealing all

Postby natman » Thu Nov 19, 2015 4:53 pm

JimShedd112 wrote:Natman, while not untrue your counsel to refer to "someone I know" when initiating discussion with the pastor is intentionally deceptive, is it not?


Perhaps. But it is a way to open a conversation in order to know where a pastor may stand on an issue before just coming out and saying, "I am a nudist." I have found that people are generally more willing to talk openly if they do not feel they are going to offend you, or if they do not think they have to "convert" your way of thinking. It also gives the person the opportunity to say, "I need to do a little studying on the subject and I will get back to you.".
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Re: Revealing all

Postby natman » Thu Nov 19, 2015 5:06 pm

nature wrote:I don't have a ultra ego and I am not planning to run a campaign in my local community to legalize open nudity or anything that drastic. It's just that I feel that I'm not being true to myself as I'm hiding the fact that I enjoy a clothes free lifestyle.

In a certain sense this feeling reminds me of a period in my life where I hid the fact that I could not stop watching porn. Since I've been free of porn I have vowed that I would not hide things again. And here I am again hiding my clothes free existence.

Maybe I'm overthinking things, maybe I've just got to much baggage . . I'm not sure but I do know I want to be open and honest.

natman I would not discuss it with my Pastor in a 3rd person format. If and when I do talk to him I will make it clear that it is me seeking answers.


Nature,

I think that is EXCELLENT. Most people I know would not be quite so bold.

I have been fortunate not to have to hide anything because my (WONDERFUL!!!) wife frequently reminds our friends and neighbors that we sometimes run around the house without clothing. So far, no negative reactions. A few have admitted doing the same. About two weeks ago, we went out to the theater and dinner with some close friends. On the way home, the wife asked me why I like to be naked all the time. I got the opportunity to point out what the Bible does and does not say about the nude human body and how constantly covering up our bodies is one of the reasons why pornography has such a draw to many of us. After the discussion, she said, "That's VERY interesting.", and that was that.

Everyone in our Sunday School class knows. I have not had the opportunity to talk about it with our current pastor, but the last two pastors that we have been involved with knew. Of course, they are both avid hunters and are accustomed to seeing other naked when they are on long hunting outings in remote areas. Basically, their attitude is, "It is what it is. God made it, so it is good.". They are both wise enough to know that it is not the nude human body that is bad. Rather, it is what is done with and to the nude human body that can be bad, just as it is what is done with and to the clothed human body that can be bad. Remember that probably 99% of the sin that is committed in this world, stealing, lying, cheating, murder, etc., is done with clothes on.
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Re: Revealing all

Postby New_Adventurer » Thu Nov 19, 2015 8:50 pm

Back to the original question...

I too enjoy the nude lifestyle, but I don't go out of my way to broadcast it the way some people might. If the question comes up I am forthright about it

I started a new job in 2000 that was 20 miles from my previous work sites (San Jose or Palo Alto to Oakland) and was in a different industry (aerospace to transportation) and I asked my wife if I should change my persona a little; go by my middle name instead if my nick name (Art instead of Bob). She said it would be hard to keep your two worlds apart and it would be too easy to slip up. She was quite right.

I even have a Tee shirt that says “Keep Calm and Ask Bob”. Ever see "Ask Art" on a shirt?

By the way, the shirt in the picture is DAD in the binary form of the ASCII character number.
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Re: Revealing all

Postby nakedpreacher » Thu Nov 19, 2015 11:49 pm

I think that I would do some serious reading on the issue before you go and speak to your pastor. learn what are the arguments against nudity and how to biblically refute them. does your pastor know about your former bondage to porn and was it naturism that helped you break those bonds, if he doesn't know you may need to consider whether this may have to be a part of your argument. Lay out for yourself beforehand what you wish to accomplish, what you think you may reasonably accomplish and count the potential cost of revealing all. and of course most importantly pray, that God would give you wisdom as to whether you should even have the conversation, how to approach the conversation and when to end the conversation. I do not know your pastor but it is possible that you may lose your relationship with him, what is the risk and is it worth the risk. If you choose not to bring it up, you are not doing anything wrong, you are not lying so do not let it weigh on your conscience. If you do reveal yourself and the outcome is positive then you have a lot more freedom. these are difficult decisions to make, may God grant you wisdom in the coming days
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Re: Revealing all

Postby Bare_Truth » Fri Nov 20, 2015 11:20 pm

Nature,
I think I can identify with much of your situation and I would offer a few suggestions particularly important to how you exercise your conscience.

It is not necessary to simply tell everybody all about yourself. Knowledge is power and there are many who simply cannot be trusted with that much power over you. Yes, on line, on different web sites, I use different names, and I appear as different "personas". But I do so honestly, all my presonnas really are "me!", but they are different facets of me. Like the blind men and the elephant, not everyone perceives me the same way and not everyone needs to.

While I have often mentioned in passing that I am an engineer and college professor (ret.) I do not speak to you or anyone else here as a college professor. In the same way, at church, I tell other members not to address me as Dr., and then with a bit of a grin I tell them that they can do that only after they have taken a course from me in Kinematics and Dynamics of Machinery, or Metallurgy, or Advanced Machine Design. At church my credentials as a Doctor of Engineering and Professor are simply not relevant. Here on this siteI do not think I have ever explained to anyone here about the Austenite, Martensite, and Feathery Bainite crystalline structures in carbon steels, and it would probably be exceedingly boring and uninteresting to most here if I did.

In the limited expression of ourselves, we should only express what is of interest to those we converse with, and I should add, "only that which is rightfully of interest to them". Some of what we are we keep private from others that are our friends. Surely you do not discuss your intimate life with your wife with your colleagues at work, It is none of their business!!! Using multiple personas on the web is like that, and there is nothing wrong with having different names for your different personas as a defense against someone using information about you one place in other venues where it might be damaging.

As for discussing with your pastor about "I know this guy", Or "I have this friend" is so transparent that if your pastor friend does not recognize that for what it is, he probably lacks the acumen to be a good counsellor. I would recommend that you take a very truthful approach if you want to discuss it with him, but not perhaps in the way that might sound! Go ahead and study up on the arguments against and for naturism as acceptable for Christians, and then tell him that you have found a website that at first seemed like an oxymoron in that it deals with "Christian" naturism, and it seemed contradictory and that as you looked into it you found that the weight of the arguments for it far exceeded the arguments against it, and wanted to know his take on it. You might also point out that the posters on that site are strong advocates of Christianity and Christian morality and find salacious references to nudity as offensive and un-Christian. Nevertheless we find no condemnation of or warnings against chaste social nudism in the scripture, and the arguments for it are well put together. Further, our expression of our Christian Belief appears to be sincere, very will informed, biblical, and well reasoned.

Back on the matters of personas I am honest about my personas! In none of them to I tell anyone that I am an Astronaut, I do not pose as a Woman, I do not pose as an MD, or a Lawyer, or a Fireman, or a Ditch Digger or an Agronomist. I am honestly all that I say that I am in each persona, I just am more than all that I express. I just don't express all that I am! I doubt I could engage in a very interesting strip here as a Kinamatician even though that is the field in which I wrote my Doctoral Dissertation.

Just be who you are even if you do not express all of who you are to just anybody. It is not dishonest, even if they want to know! It is just not everybody's business! Only ONE needs to know everything about you and he already does, better than even you know yourself.

I can almost assure you that if the pastor friend is the one that helped you work through past history as a victim of sexual abuse, and if he is opposed to naturism, he will almost certainly jump to the conclusion that your interest in the Nudist/Naturist issue is an outgrowth or manifestation of the abuse you suffered..

Normally that past tragedy is not something that I would encourage you to share on line, however in this case I think you have probably seen enough of posts about how getting rid of the impact of pornography has been a repeated theme on true naturist sites that advocate chaste naturism. And I think that you have sensed that many of us here have made such an attitude adjustment, be it a great one or a lesser one. While I have never had to deal with a porn addiction, I did come to see that due to my upbringing I was looking at the matter of the nude human form as being un-Christian and and sex as somehow a tainted thing. Only through what I encountered on line did I get a true perspective, an innocent perspective, about such matters. Nudity does not equal sex! Nudity/Naturism is a very beneficial thing in one's life if one is called to receive it.

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Re: Revealing all

Postby Ramblinman » Sat Nov 21, 2015 12:32 am

I recall another forum in which one user had created two online personalities.
They were always arguing with one another! :shock:
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Re: Revealing all

Postby Petros » Sat Nov 21, 2015 2:34 am

Ramblinman wrote:I recall another forum in which one user had created two online personalities.
They were always arguing with one another! :shock:


For me - and I assume Bare Truth, whose position here and mine are one - that would be a strain. I tyhink it might have to come out of a deep disgust with the forum.

I CAN argue both sides of a question, in many cases - but "both of me" see both sides. It would be easier to be petros and "Pete", the latter running close to petros that was many moons back.
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