Little brothers

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Little brothers

Postby Danni.Elkson » Tue Jan 06, 2009 2:00 pm

Hello,
I was wondering if I could get a little help on a situation. I was over at my friend's house, she is also a "closet nudist" and the same age as me. We knew we would have her house to ourselves for a while, so we decided to get more comfortable and stripped down. We were watching TV in the living room when we heard a car pull up outside. She looked out and saw it was the mother of a friend of her brother(he's 15), and she was dropping her brother off. We turned of the TV in the living room, and headed up to her bedroom(which is where our clothes were). We decided to just close the door though and watch TV there for a while, figuring we would enjoy the time while we could. Anyway, I think her brother suspects something. He kept trying to get into her room. It seemed like every couple of minutes he had a question for her or me. We would just open the door a crack, so he couldn't see in, and answer him. After a few times of this happening we just got dressed, and gave up. Now I'm wondering should we tell him about us?
Here's some problems I can see. The first one is he may go and tell other people, and since it seems like no one accepts the thought of us being nudist we don't want that to happen. The other one is most guys at that age only have one thing on their mind, and if that is all thats on his mind would he just say he's interested in being a nudest just to see us(mainly me since its her brother) nude. There are probably other problems I could think of, but right now my mind isn't working... Anyway all thoughts would be great.
Danni

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Postby jochanaan » Tue Jan 06, 2009 8:44 pm

Seems to me that, since you girls were in her bedroom, that's a "privacy zone." Maybe all you need to do is ask the mother to remind the little brother of that fact. After all, you might have been trying on some of those clothes! :lol: No need to bring "the N word" into the conversation at all. 8)
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Postby Danni.Elkson » Wed Jan 07, 2009 9:05 am

jochanaan wrote:Seems to me that, since you girls were in her bedroom, that's a "privacy zone." Maybe all you need to do is ask the mother to remind the little brother of that fact. After all, you might have been trying on some of those clothes! :lol: No need to bring "the N word" into the conversation at all. 8)


I never gave that a thought... If we were "trying on clothes" when he was knocking he would have really been invading our privacy.... I'll talk to her about bringing it up that was to her mom... But I won't want to get him in trouble either... I'll talk to my friend and see what she thinks... Thanks for the thought. :)
Danni

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Postby Larryk1052 » Wed Jan 07, 2009 8:29 pm

I don't think I would share your nudism with him unless you completely thrust him. Something like knowing his sister and her best friend enjoy being nude together might just be too hard not to share in "confidence" with his best friend who would share with his, till one day all sorts of wild stories about you two would be all over school.

Like most of us nudism is something you must be very careful about sharing. I'd wait till he is at least 19 or 20 when he is hopefully mature enough to really know to keep his mouth shut.

The changing clothes idea was good also just ignoring him may work.

If you really want to share with him that you are nudist, your friend needs to gradually just let her guard down by letting him catch glimses of her naked. Then she can begin teaching him about good nudity and that it just isn't for sex. You'll know when the time is right because he will begin letting his guard down and his attitude to nudity will become more mature. Go slow, real slow.
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Postby Danni.Elkson » Thu Jan 08, 2009 7:07 am

Larryk1052 wrote:I don't think I would share your nudism with him unless you completely thrust him. Something like knowing his sister and her best friend enjoy being nude together might just be too hard not to share in "confidence" with his best friend who would share with his, till one day all sorts of wild stories about you two would be all over school.

Like most of us nudism is something you must be very careful about sharing. I'd wait till he is at least 19 or 20 when he is hopefully mature enough to really know to keep his mouth shut.

The changing clothes idea was good also just ignoring him may work.

If you really want to share with him that you are nudist, your friend needs to gradually just let her guard down by letting him catch glimses of her naked. Then she can begin teaching him about good nudity and that it just isn't for sex. You'll know when the time is right because he will begin letting his guard down and his attitude to nudity will become more mature. Go slow, real slow.


I guess thats part of the problem, I odn't know if I trust him completely. I know she trusts him, but she's his sister. But I don't want stories all over school about us either...

Just ignoring him is hard to do. He can be really persistent when he wants to be....

Along the line of her letting her guard down and him catching glimses of her naked. That has happened several times over the last few years. There were times when she would go from the bathroom to her bedroom(maybe 5 feet from door to door) after getting a shower, and he would see her briefly.

I talked to her last night on this subject, and she really wants to tell him about herself and being a nudist... We aren't totally sure how we are going to handle it yet, but I agree we do really need to go slow....
Danni

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Postby Larryk1052 » Thu Jan 08, 2009 8:53 am

What was the brother's reaction to those quick glimses of his sister nudity?
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Postby Danni.Elkson » Thu Jan 08, 2009 10:01 am

Larryk1052 wrote:What was the brother's reaction to those quick glimses of his sister nudity?


She said at first he used to seem embarrassed and would go back into his bedroom quickly. but now she says he'll just stand there and talk to her like he doesn't notice...
Danni

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Postby jochanaan » Thu Jan 08, 2009 11:40 am

Danni.Elkson wrote:
Larryk1052 wrote:What was the brother's reaction to those quick glimses of his sister nudity?


She said at first he used to seem embarrassed and would go back into his bedroom quickly. but now she says he'll just stand there and talk to her like he doesn't notice...

Oh, now that's interesting! Maybe, just maybe, you've got another potential convert! :D But you'll have to go slow and build trust gradually. And perhaps you should also let him know the dire consequences if word gets out--I assume his sister knows what "dire consequences" she can inflict on him that will ensure his compliance! :lol:
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Postby natman » Thu Jan 08, 2009 11:45 am

Danni,

One thing you may want to consider is that by "hiding" the fact that you and your friend are attempting to practice simple nudity, your friend's brother is obviously suspicious that something is going on. He may assume that you are in a lesbian relationship instead. If he spreads THAT story, it may be even more damaging than the truth.

If your friend actually does trust her brother, it may be better for her to begin talking to him about good nudity versus bad nudity so that he is not confused.
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Postby Danni.Elkson » Thu Jan 08, 2009 2:13 pm

Thanks for the replies...

jochanaan: I'm sure she can inflict some "dire consequences" on him if she tells him, and he tells anyone. She is starting to think that he may be willing to try it...

Natman: I know what you mean about the rumors he could spread. I deffinitly wouldn't want him to spread we were in a lesbian relationship or anything like that, because we aren't. I really think she trusts him, and I trust her.

I'm going to be talking to her later tonight, and maybe we'll decide on something. :)
Danni

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Postby Jon-Marc » Thu Jan 08, 2009 2:43 pm

Danni.Elkson wrote:
Larryk1052 wrote:What was the brother's reaction to those quick glimses of his sister nudity?


She said at first he used to seem embarrassed and would go back into his bedroom quickly. but now she says he'll just stand there and talk to her like he doesn't notice...


Well, that sounds encouraging. Maybe he could be persuaded to become a nudist. Of course, the parents should be asked about his joining you girls (if he would and if you and his sister would be comfortable with it) since you could be accused of something of which you don't want to be accused if you do it behind their backs.
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Postby Larryk1052 » Thu Jan 08, 2009 5:07 pm

The brothers reaction seems to be positive. The sister needs to keep exposing him to simple nudity and to talk to him about it. I think once he wants to try it and having tried it he demonstrates understanding of good nudity, then he could introduced to others. Oh, what do the parents think about nudity? As long as you all are under age their opinion is important.
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Postby eGriffen » Fri Jan 09, 2009 7:19 am

Larryk1052 wrote:The brothers reaction seems to be positive. The sister needs to keep exposing him to simple nudity and to talk to him about it. I think once he wants to try it and having tried it he demonstrates understanding of good nudity, then he could introduced to others. Oh, what do the parents think about nudity? As long as you all are under age their opinion is important.


I thought I would get in on this discussion. It is me and my brother that she is asking about. Danni and I have talked about this a lot, and she was keeping me up to date on what was being said here. We are both planning on taking things really slow with my brother. I've also started talking to him. So far I haven't brought up Danni and I being closet nudist. i've just brought up him seeing me nude, and his feeling about it. He told me last night that at first when he would catch me coming from the bathroom to my bedroom, and I was naked, it would make him really uncomfortable. But now he says it doesn't really bother him all that much. So to me that is a good thing.

As for what my parents think.... Well, I really don't want to ask them. They are totally against nudity. If either one of them catch me going from the bathroom to my bedroom with out covering up I get in trouble. They feel nude=lewd. So if I asked them about it, i know they would say no I can't be a nudist, closet or otherwise, and no my brother and I can't be in the same room nude. They would even throw a huge fit if they new that Danni and I hang out nude. So for now asking them is out of the question. I know that the adults here are going to say that that is a bad thing, but I honestly feel thats how it has to be.

Em
Emily
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Postby Danni.Elkson » Fri Jan 09, 2009 7:26 am

Hey everyone,
Now that Emily registered for the group, and it is her brother, I'll probably let her answer most of the questions. But I would like to thank everyone for their help so far.
Danni

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Postby root » Fri Jan 09, 2009 7:59 am

eGriffen wrote:As for what my parents think.... Well, I really don't want to ask them. They are totally against nudity. If either one of them catch me going from the bathroom to my bedroom with out covering up I get in trouble. They feel nude=lewd. So if I asked them about it, i know they would say no I can't be a nudist, closet or otherwise, and no my brother and I can't be in the same room nude. They would even throw a huge fit if they new that Danni and I hang out nude. So for now asking them is out of the question. I know that the adults here are going to say that that is a bad thing, but I honestly feel thats how it has to be.
Em


Just to start out, I am going to make some assumptions, so please feel free to correct me if I am wrong. Also, not yet being a parent myself, I am stretch a bit here, so those who are parents can feel free to slap me around a bit if necessary.

Your parents are not evil-willed people. They don't wake up in the morning and start looking for ways to make your life miserable. I will even go so far as to say they probably love you.

This being said, why would they react like that? How do they get from Love to "Put some clothes on right now or you're grounded!"?

Remember, to your parents, it was only last week that you were 4 and asking them everything and anything, and happy to do it. They were your single source for information about anything. Fast forward to today, when they see you walking around naked without being ashamed and covering up. They see this and internally the say "Ah! My daughter! Walking around naked! I never taught her that! Who taught her that! I'm not important, my teachings aren't important! My daughter is growing up! Ahhh!" It's a very scary experience for them, and out of fear they react in a manner that you consider to be slightly less than rational.

I think that if I were in your situation, I would go to my mother or father (whichever you would feel more comfortable with), and say "Hey, I found this article on Body Shame and Women and wanted to know what you thought about it."

Approaching it like that makes it less scary for them, and might have a better chance of success than just sitting down and saying "I'm a nudist".
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